My Bar Conversation

After a roller coaster week, I went out for a much needed drink on Friday night with my friend Sarah. Living in Hollywood I am lucky that I can just walk to a nearby bar when my car is in the shop for a costly mission of getting all new brakes. The Velvet Margarita hosted our desire to celebrate Sarah's new job and my thankfulness that I have a job. After a tasty dinner of salmon quesadillas topped off with strawberry margaritas and whatever beer Sarah was drinking, we continued to talk about all that was going on in our lives. Normal conversation to me, but not to the guy eavesdropping. "That's the deepest conversation I've ever heard in Hollywood," this man who claimed to be a doctor told us. I wasn't really sure how to respond, so I just politely smiled and listened to his long spiel about how our conversation and my amazing hat persuaded him to strut over and attempt to ask me out.

I didn't and don't have any intention of embarking on a date with him, but his astonishment with my conversation did cause me to contemplate the lack of connection found by many in Los Angeles. Everyone always blames cars--the need to have one and the always being in one. I think it might be more though. To have a connection with someone, both people must be truly present. In a city that is predominately focused on the entertainment industry (an industry I see as overly anxiety filled), complete presence is a challenge. Physical presence is rampid--celebrities, industry professionals, and wannabe stars are all out and about looking their best in hopes of being seen and grabbing any chance they have to network. Personal connections with people that will have your back, listen to the trials going on in your life and celebrate your accomplishments without feeling secretly envious is not as common.

The L.A. mind so often seems to be sporadic in its focus. When will I make it? Will I work again? How am I going to become successful or work my way up to success? Is there anyone to hit on or that will hit on me to make me feel better about this stage in my life? Looking around the bar, I saw all these thoughts constantly flickering through the various bar patrons minds. Eyes darting with fear and then maybe a quick smile to cover up their burden of fear.

Observing those around me have never been my strong suit. When I go out with a friend, I tend to really want to hang out with just them and I end up forming this little bubble blocking out all that is happening outside of it. I'm not out looking for a man to date for a few weeks or for temporary attention. After this doctor left the bar along with his observation of me to ponder, I took a quick look around at all the ulterior motives for being out at a bar that had nothing to do with a friendship connection. People were out with other people, but no one was really looking at each other. They were concerned with everything but that person they were with. My scan of the bar had me knowing that I liked my bubble, and love that after ten years of living off and on in L.A., I have friends that are willing to join me inside.

Famous Latinos. So hilarious.

Sarah and I

1970's Saks Fifth Avenue vintage hat; gray 100% silk long-sleeved Yellow Is Gold blouse from Urban Outfitters; vintage rust colored crushed velvet clutch; J Brand skinny jeans; brown heels with gold embellishment.

This beautiful brown felt hat with a dark peach ribbon and rhinestone brooch was bought from Saks Fifth Avenue in the 1970's and generously given to me a few weeks ago. I'm pretty much in-love with it...and the compliments are constant.

The gorgeous and oh so elegant vintage rust colored crushed velvet purse I purchased at the flea market a couple of weeks ago. It goes perfectly with my hat!